Test results poser

I've got to the point that I get really excited about interesting maths problems (this might not be a new issue, but being a teacher allows me to unashamedly embrace the inner geek), and I came across this one a couple of days ago:

A disease has broken out in the world, which infects on average one in every 1000 people. The onset has no physical symptoms in the early stages, but medics have developed a test that is able to detect the disease with an accuracy of 95%, or more precisely, the test will return positive with 100% accuracy if the person tested is infected, but will return a false positive (i.e. will say the person is infected when in fact they are not) 5% of the time if the person is not infected. 

You take the test, and the result is positive. What is the probability that you are infected with the disease? Is it:

(a) 100%

(b) 95%

(c) 2%

Answers on a postcard (or a comment, if you must) with explanation. I'll reveal the answer some time in the future...

There may not be a God, but ostriches definitely exist

Earlier in the week, as I was travelling up to a friend's, I picked up a copy of The Guardian (it seems I've become like that...) to pass the journey, and stumbled upon this article by Polly Toynbee. Now it's this sort of article that could spawn a thousand blog posts (and for all I know, already has), but I shall limit myself to comment on the slogans the British Humanist Association has decided to print on buses:

"There's probably no God. Now stop worrying and enjoy your life."

I'm guessing the intention to be a counterbalance to the bible verses put up by the Trinitarian Bible Society, a nice little message to not get caught up in all this "religion" and to get on with life in the present. Except I don't think it really gets there - after all, this is meant to be a counterthrust to those who claim there is a God who is worth bothering about, and moreso that:

"It is a fearful thing to fall into the hands of the living God."

Hebrews 10:31

Now, if that's the two arguments, I really, really do not want the word "probably" to still be there before I "stop worrying and enjoy my life". The phrase "smile, it might never happen" seems a little patronising and lacking in comfort when the worry is about some variety of minor stress, and I am a little astonished to see the British Humanist Association using an equivalent to casually pass over matters of eternal significance.

I want to stop before I start to sound like I'm presenting some form of Pascal's Wager, or making Christianity sound like all it has to offer is a psychological feeling of security, both of which I feel does not do justice to the truth and beauty of the message gospel, but it is simply interesting to note that the offering of the leading "freethinking" society in this country is that we can't be sure but let's not worry our pretty little heads about such lofty things...

For unto us a child is born

“Fear not, for behold, I bring you good news of a great joy that will be for all the people. For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Savior, who is Christ the Lord.”

Luke 2:10-11

Great news! Wishing you all a very merry Christmas, a Saviour has come!

“There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. For the law of the Spirit of life has set you free in Christ Jesus from the law of sin and death. For God has done what the law, weakened by the flesh, could not do. By sending his own Son in the likeness of sinful flesh and for sin, he condemned sin in the flesh, in order that the righteous requirement of the law might be fulfilled in us, who walk not according to the flesh but according to the Spirit.”

Romans 8:1-4

Signs that I'm still a not from round these parts, no. 1 - The Trains

I've figured out that I really don't understand the ticketing system for National Rail. I've been checking prices of tickets to go up to Durham (those with ears to hear...), and was under the assumption that the further you book in advance the cheaper it would be. So as a test, I entered a date for 12 weeks away, and was quoted a price of £70ish - not ideal. It was only then that I realised that that was for an "anytime" ticket, and it hadn't offered any advance tickets. So I knocked the date back a month, and got quoted £25ish - much more reasonable.

So to get the right fare, do you book in advance, but not too much in advance? Why is this starting to feel like buying something on eBay?

I'm now waiting to see Imhotep on the exam papers...

As it was the last week of school, I was taking a laid back approach to my classes, taking time to watch some videos and generally relax before the end of term. I decided as a bit of a joke to show this to some of my classes, not letting on the genre:



At the end of the class, I asked my Year 11s:

"OK, you can admit it, how long did it take you to work out it was a spoof?"

To which they responded:

"A spoof, sir?"

Oh dear...

Home, where my thoughts escape me...

Well, I'm now back in Belfast after surviving my first full term, feeling somewhat shattered and ready for a rest. To aid in this, I have brought exactly no work home with me, and I don't have much reason to feel guilty about having done so, so what lies ahead for the next few days is one of rest, a little personal study and reading, and meeting of old friends. Should be fun.

As all good things do, it won't last forever, travel back is before New Year and there is moving and preparation to be done, but that can definitely wait for a few days...

If he was a candidate eight years ago, who knows...

"Well, I've been sleeping like a baby - sleep two hours, wake up and cry, sleep two hours, wake up and cry..."

John McCain on Jay Leno, in response to being asked how he's been doing since Election Day

Sir is always right, even when he's wrong, he's always right...

Some days, my mind does not seem to come even close to working. This is demonstrated by my activities in a lesson this morning explaining how to factorise quadratic equations. I'd warned the class beforehand that the method was quite difficult, and I think my actions showed that...

Firstly, I'd point out that I'm an engineer by training, and therefore a somewhat lazy mathematician. The result of this is that if I need to solve an anyway tough looking quadratic (that is, one with a co-efficient of x squared greater than one...), I'll shove it straight into the quadratic equation without even thinking of factorising. This means that I'm less than fluent when it comes to factorisation. It should have been less of a surprise then when I ran through my example and soon found it didn't factorise. D'oh, not to worry though, I just made another one up. The unfortunate thing is that not only is my factorising pretty rubbish, so is my mental arithmetic, and so my second example also didn't work...

Third time was the charm, but I think I was long past the attention span of my class. Maybe next lesson I'll get it right...

Sin and Boredom

I've been reading some of Dale Ralph Davis's commentaries on the Old Testament history books (which incidentally, I would struggle to recommend highly enough), and I've been struck by his highlighting of the "boringness" of sin. Particularly noticeable in Judges and the books of Kings, the reports of the sins of the nation of Israel soon become repetitive and boring. Think of the refrain in the epitaphs of the Kings of Israel in I and II Kings, such as this example from I Kings 15:33-34:

"In the third year of Asa king of Judah, Baasha the son of Ahijah began to reign over all of Israel at Tirzah, and he reigned for twenty-four years. He did what was evil in the sight of the LORD and walked in the way of Jeroboam and in his sin which he made Israel to sin."

It's same old, same old. New guy comes in, and does the same thing as the first king of Israel did as he made the nation sin. I picked this example because that's the first passage my bible opened at, I could have taken my pick from a number of others. Similarly, the book of Judges has a similar pattern of boredom, the phrasing at the beginning of chapter 4 says much:

"And the people Israel again did what was evil in the sight of the LORD after Ehud died."

There's a sense of frustration in the tone, "after this guy died, they just went back to what they did before...". Davies's claim is that this is very deliberate, there is no creativity that arrises from rebellion against God, just a lukewarm rehash of what has come before.

As I've been studying Romans recently, part of what I was reading in Romans 7 resonated with this feeling from the Old Testament:

"What then shall we say? That the law is sin? By no means! Yet if it had not been for the law, I would not have known sin. I would not have known what it is to covet if the law had not said, "You shall not covet." But sin, seizing an opportunity through the commandment, produced in me all kinds of covetousness."

Romans 7:7-8a

These verses give me the mental picture of me wanting to rebel, but not being able to think of a way to do so. In the end, my sinful nature has to wait until I hear the law before I can find a suitable way to be rebellious! Sinfulness can't think for itself - it needs to react to something good, such as God's law, before it can get inspiration to rebel. There is no originality, sinning is going to be the same old, same old.

Davis goes on to point to show that the real points where the narrative gets exciting in the history of Israel is when we encounter characters living in God's service, thinking of episodes such as Joshua's initial conquest of the land, the often intriguing and exciting saving actions of the Judges and the reigns of the Godly kings of Judah such as Jehu. This shouldn't be surprising, to follow the creative God, the God who brings all things into being, is inevitably going to be exciting, yet if we rebel against God how can we expect anything other that creativity to flee from us? In the words of Jesus,

"The thief comes only to steal and destroy. I come that they may have life and have it abundantly."

John 10:10

Dates in the completion of an Engineering Degree...

6th October 2002: Arrive in Oxford as a first year undergraduate.

19th October 2002: Matriculate as a member of the University of Oxford

17th June 2006: Finish exam in Engineering Mathematics, bringing an end to my studies for the degree of Master of Engineering.

And now...

23rd May 2009: Date set to graduate and receive the degree of Master of Engineering.

It's better late than never, I suppose. It's particularly amusing that I've completed a post-graduate qualification before I've been accredited with my undergraduate one...

Indications of being a geek

On an afternoon in Paris, wondering what to do, you look at a map of the metro looking for inspiration, you see La Défense and think

"Oh, I can go and see that three-dimensional projection of a four-dimensional hypercube!"

followed by some sort of justification along the lines of

"That would be cool!"

I have to admit, I was genuinely excited. As it was I had more reason to be so than just my mathematical geekery - it is a rather impressive structure. I'd known it was big (La Grande Arche de la Défense being a bit of a give away I suppose) but I wasn't quite prepared for quite how colossal it was. There's something rather breathtaking about huge, yet very simple, structures.

All of this was marginally before I then got swept away by being impressed by Parisian city planning (it only goes from bad to worse), as I turn round to find L'Arc de Triomphe lined up exactly, with the Champs Élysées running along the line between the two arches. It's been pointed out to me that my amazement would have been lessened if I'd went to the length of research that involves looking at a map, but as I commented on Sunday, looking at a map lessens the excitement that can come from these sort of things...

No Condemnation

I am rather amazed that, until it was pointed out to me, I'd never appreciated the present tense in the following:

"There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus."

Romans 8:1

I'd always seen the aspect that related the to the future. At one point I faced condemnation, now through the death of Christ I, through faith in him, no longer fear condemnation at that last day. I got that, and found comfort in that. But there's more to it than just that.

In Christ, I face no condemnation. Not now, not tomorrow, not ever. I know that when I stand before judgement that I will face no condemnation, but actually when I go through hard times and dark periods, at the times when I can't understand what's happening or why I feel the way I do, I can be assured of this, it is not God's condemnation for me. This is a glorious truth, because it means that in those hard times, my refuge and my comfort is still my God. I don't have to run from him in the hard times, in fear that I have invited his judgement, but I can continue, with trembling, to throw myself on His mercy as the one who forgives and comforts sinners, such as myself.

At the end of a week where I've felt lonely, ill, disquiet and guilt, I am able to remind myself that there is no condemnation for those in Christ, and the God who answered my call for His mercy all those years back is still the same comfort now as He was for me then. Amen.

These thoughts come off the back of listening to this sermon by John Piper.

The planning, it would seem, doesn't stop...

No longer does take a day off sick mean having a day off - I've just spent an hour sorting out potential cover ready to e-mail off in case I don't recover by tomorrow, as well as figuring out whether my lessons can be planned for Monday. Joy.

It's a good incentive for not taking spurious leave I suppose...

Fun at the Concert Hall

On other news, I took my first trip to the Colston Hall last night to hear the Bournemouth Symphony Orchestra (who were excellent, although I was a little tired last night and I'm not sure I appreciated as much as I could have). They opened with a piece by George Enescu, someone I'd never heard of (although that's not massively difficult, given my knowledge of music), but it was a wonderfully enjoyable tune. I can't comment on its technicality, but I enjoyed it, and thought I'd share for those who might be interested:

The happy result, and the final end to the PGCE...

I am now the possessor of 60 masters credits in Education. The mark for my dissertation has come back, and although 51 is hardly a comfortable mark, it is still a pass at masters level. This means I am entitled to a Post-Graduate Certificate of Education, as opposed to the Professional Graduate Certificate of Education that I would have received otherwise.

As so draw an end to this stage of University education (possibly not the last chapter, after all, I've another 120 credits to amass before a Masters in Education...) My student card has expired (as of the 30th September), and I've received all my results. I suppose I'm in the real world now...

Sorkinesque

In the semi-comatose state that I exist in most evening returning from school, I'm working my way through all 7 series of The West Wing, which now reside in my room in Bristol. It's as great as the first time I watched it, and I keep coming across the most fantastic lines, like this one when Toby is arguing with a congresswoman about the National Endowment for the Arts:

Congresswoman: Here's a woman who gets naked, covers herself completely in chocolate and sings. Does that appeal to you?

Toby: By and large, I'm not wild about musicals...

And there are many more. Aaron Sorkin is a genius.

A shout into the Aether

I'm realising that I'm becoming my usual uncommunicative self - I've been known to be a little hard to get information from when at a distance, mainly due to my heavy dislike of long telephone conversations and lack of patience in writing e-mails lasting more than a couple of lines. Rectification is in order, and another doomed resolution for change will probably follow.

For the time being, I'm still alive, the first week of teaching has been successfully completed and I'm actually quite enjoying it (although I've had a few moments of panic when contemplating the volume of work!). Settling into Bristol is also coming along, although it can still be a bit lonely at times. Most of the time, though, I'm very busy, and it's true to say that there have been a large number from school and from church that have made me feel very welcome indeed.

Hopefully, there'll be more personalised correspondence in time. One lives in hope...

Like most things, it seemed like a good idea at the time

I played basketball for the first time in years last night, resulting in a rather large about of limping today. This is mostly due to take a tumble and twisting my ankle, although my poor judgement shone through as this tumble was 10 minutes into an hour and a half session.

Was good fun though...

State of the Union

Good news (possibly): The chances of being Union Rep at my school are quite high.
Bad news: I'm likely to be representing myself, and myself alone.

Third largest teaching union finds it's first member at SMRT. I even found someone who didn't know it existed...

The end, of sorts

This is sort of a transition now. By one definition, I've left studenthood (for the second time...) by handing in my resubmission of my dissertation. This is definitely the last piece of work for PGCE, it is now done - although I suppose I've still to wait for it to be marked, and my student card claims I'm still a PGCE student until the end of September.

Still, this is the last time (for now at least) that I'll be in Oxford with a specific role. Future visits will render me merely a visitor. And scariest of all, this means that studenthood is being left behind and the real world awaits. Work starts on Wednesday... :S

September approacheth

I'm looking at the time and realising that you'd probably never guess that I have an early start tomorrow. Taxi at 7am to get to the airport to check in for an 8.40am flight. Urgh, I thought I'd learnt not to go for early flights again. Annoyingly as well, the earliest bus into Oxford isn't for two and a half hours after I land, so I'll be hanging around the wonderful London Luton Airport. Fun.

Anyway, it shall be a flying visit to Oxford as I take time to resubmit my dissertation, then off to Bristol lunchtime Monday, ready for work to begin afresh on Wednesday. The nerves are starting to build again, it feels so long since I last taught (possibly because it is - mid-June if my memory serves me) and now I'm a "proper" teacher, responsible for classes and stuff. Eek.

Right, I think bed is in order, it's looking a long day tomorrow...

Northern Irish geography can be difficult

A great comment came up on BBC Radio Ulster. At the end of last week there was quite heavy rain causing significant flooding. Thankfully, Radio Ulster was around to pass on phoned in travel advice on how to avoid the flooded areas:

"I've been told there's heavy flooding in the area between Warrenpoint and Omeath, so be careful if you are travelling in that area,"

The comment from many further people phoning in was something like:

"Yep, it's called Carlingford Lough..."

This narrowly beat Hugo Duncan's comment about a tagline for Newry City (in line with "New York, New York, so good they named it twice" or "See Naples and die"):

"See Newry and Mourne"

Possibly a little local for general consumption, but made me smile...

It's all about breakfast...

This morning I had a couple of rounds of wheaten bread followed by a piece of fruit soda. With coffee.

This may not mean much, but I think I'm nearly home... :)

Impulse (advance) travel purchases

I've decided to try and commit myself to my jaunt to Switzerland in October half-term (especially considering I've just found out it's two days longer than I thought it was) by booking plane tickets from Bristol to Geneva. As yet, without return. I'm still hoping that I'll be able to organise cheap-ish TGV/Eurostar tickets for that. This may serve to show I have no clue what I'm doing...

Searching for fun and games in Bristol

I'm now starting to think about what other random stuff I can do in Bristol to meet people. Top of the list is joining a book group (which will probably be interpreted as a rather head-long rush into middle-aged-ness...) or trying to start up a killer pub quiz team. The second one is obviously very appealing, although the chances of it being a killer team is reduced as for me to be on it, it would involve me being on it. I'm sure we can overcome this...

YouTube Download

Seeing that most schools put a block on YouTube, this extension for FireFox is just fantastic. Download clip, show in classroom. Brilliant. I can definitely see this being quite helpful for organising tutor time.

I'm sure that there are several points in this post that show that my transformation into a teacher is probably close to complete...

Still not in Belfast, right first letter though...

Just a quick update on how things are going, I've now been in Bristol for just over a week and I'm starting to feel a little settled, which is good. Particular highlights so far is that I've settled into a good church, and I've been made to feel very welcome there, and I'm starting to feel like I know what I'm doing at work. It's still a bit of an odd time at the moment, I'm working but I'm sort of not - I don't start actual teaching until September, so these few weeks will involve planning for next term and having a rather large amount of information downloaded upon me.

I'm just recovering (I hope...) from a bit of a rough weekend, I've had a bit of a fever and sore joints over the end of last week, and that manifested itself in a rather impressive headache yesterday morning that completely threw off any plans I might have had. It still wasn't completely sorted today, which led to me leading a rather zombie-like existence today. The purchase of some ibuprofen seems to have got it under control, so hopefully will be in better shape in the morning. Just as well, I've got quite a bit of admin to get through in the next few days.

So things are going well, and it's good to have this period of time to settle in, although I'm looking forward to getting my teeth into the teaching come September. Saying that, the thought of 120+ children's mathematics education lying in my hands for a year is more than a little daunting...

"Sir, why do we use letters?"

There is something unusual about the answer to the ultimate question of life, the universe and everything:

Think of a number, any number. Add seven to that number, and multiply your answer by three. Subtract nine from that number, and double your answer. Add 228 to you answer and then divide that number by six. Finally, subtract the number you started with. What number are you left with?

Magic. At least enough to give me a good trial for witchcraft given the correct temporal context. But it only stays magic in the world of arithmetic, which is enough to baffle both my class (and possibly a reasonable number of adults) with a "how did he do that?" variety of wonder.

If we satisfy ourselves with just picking a number and trying to work through my problem over and over again, we will be left bewildered by why we get the same answer every time, no matter what number we pick originally. This is why we need to use letters, or algebra - the only way we will ever see what is going on is if we somehow do this problem for every number in existence simultaneously. This particular problem is nice because there is an initial shock when it first works, and somewhat impenetrable without generalising, but falls apart with a small amount of algebra:

Think of a number - x
Add seven - x + 7
Multiply by three - 3(x + 7) = 3x + 21
Subtract nine - 3x + 12
Double answer - 2(3x + 12) = 6x + 24
Add 228 - 6x + 252
Divide by six - x + 42
Subtract your original number - 42

I will concede that one disadvantage is that this feels like "unweaving the rainbow", there's a certain amount of fun in the "magic" that's a shame to lose, but it's a nice demonstration of why we do need to use letters rather than numbers some of the time.

Editted as there was a, ahem, 'deliberate' mistake. Once it was spotted, it would have of course been misleading to keep it there...

Enjoying classic quotes

I really like Yes, Prime Minister. I feel this is worth pointing out...

Jim Hacker: Don't tell me about the press. I know exactly who reads the papers: The Daily Mirror is read by people who think they run the country; The Guardian is read by people who think they ought to run the country; The Times is read by people who actually do run the country; The Daily Mail is read by the wives of the people who run the country; The Financial Times is read by people who own the country; The Morning Star is read by people who think the country ought to be run by another country; And the Daily Telegraph is read by people who think it is.

Sir Humphrey: Prime Minister, what about the people who read the Sun?

Bernard Woolley: Sun readers don't care who runs the country, as long as she's got big tits.

Running for cover

Hmmm, I'm starting to hear the bands start to warm up. It's probably going to get louder soon. I reckon it's getting to about the right time to make tracks before the ball starts up...

Well, it's not a conversion as such, it's still Mozilla...

I'm now back on Firefox... I've been using Camino since getting my Mac, after finding Firefox 2.0 to look a little clunky on the OSX interface and Safari to be just a little bit, well, annoying. But now, Firefox 3.0 has arrived, and it looks very nice (I can tell I've been caught up in the Mac mindframe by the fact that this is very important...) and I admit in a rather sad fashion, I feel at home with it. Camino is cool, but Firefox is just that bit more customisable and robust.

So I'm back to my old ways. You may start to see this sort of thing more often:

but I'll try to keep it to a minimum...

The Strain on my Shelf

I'm not sure how I've managed to do this, but I seem to, over the course of a year, acquired a relatively substantial library. I now have the problem of trying to transfer this to my new abode for next year...

I possibly need to stop buying books. But how have I done this in a city without anything comparing to a good second hand bookshop?

Actual New Music!

Viva la Vida has arrived! :) First listenings now in progress...

It's been a year...

As a bit of a one for remembering dates, today and tomorrow marks a bit of a personal anniversary. I left Kuala Lumpur International Airport in the afternoon of Monday 11th June 2008, arriving back in London Heathrow on the morning of Tuesday 12th June. Hence, today and tomorrow mark one year of leaving Malaysia and returning to the UK.

Maybe time for some reflection over the past year? Maybe, although despite the significance of the date it's probably not the most helpful act to indulge in. Maybe some other time...

New Word Alive 2009

I've just seen the line up for New Word Alive 2009, and it is looking fun - line up includes Don Carson and Terry Virgo, with Vaughan Roberts speaking on week 1 and Liam Goligher on week 2.

Now I am planning to get a group to go on week 2 (as this is the only one that coincides with Easter break) and wondering if I can recruit people to start a group? If you are interested, let me know as soon as possible and I shall start to look organised!

CA3: No longer continuing

It took half an hour in Green Café this morning before I gave up on trying to read through my first draft. Almost a new record. On the plus side, I did manage to add a new paragraph on implications of my study on my professional development, which has bumped the word length up to something more respectable. And most importantly, it means my final assignment for the year is now submitted. Wahoo!

Now, lesson planning, I think that can wait until tomorrow, it's such a nice day outside...

CA3: Continuing...

First draft done. Might actually be a first draft rather than my normal lips service of intending on reading through and tidying up...

Incidentally, I mentioned yesterday that sanity was being maintained by old music. That's not the entirety of the truth - YouTube has also been helpful in letting me watch lots of stuff like this:

"New" music purchases

On more positive notes, I've just received "Minutes to Midnight" by Linkin Park and "Jagged Little Pill" by Alanis Morissette. I don't claim to be cutting edge, but I'm enjoying the listening. Should keep me amused for the next few days...

Curriculum Assignment 3: This time, it's personal...

It's the last one, that's what I keep telling myself. Gah. Really slow going...

1,750 words down. It's looking like I'm going to do my usual job of pushing my essay over the minimum while everyone else is trying to cut theirs to below the maximum...

Traveller's dreams...

It is half term, which inevitably means time to write my assignment due the Monday back from holidays. At least this is the last one. I've had the normal first day of work for it, which in short is not much at all, which is leading me to think that I should probably give up and consider tomorrow a new day. In the meantime, I've turned my thoughts to next year, when these holidays, to the most part, will actually be holidays...

Last year, I was forced to take a holiday every three months due to the fact that my visa ran out and I needed to leave and re-enter the country to extend it. Oddly enough, I didn't complain too much about this - it was rather nice to take a few days away somewhere, relax and look around somewhere new. It also offered something to look forward to when work was tiring and I was feeling a bit stressed. I'm now being given advise that during my NQT year, adopting a similar policy would be wise - especially for the October half term and February Half Term (I've been told these are particularly rubbish times, which I don't find hard to believe given my experience this year). Hence, I've been joyfully making plans...

Here are some of my initial thoughts - any recommendations or willing co-travellers welcome!

October: Geneva, Berne and Zurich by train - was thinking about this for past February half term but it didn't work out.

Christmas: Weekend in Dublin before heading up north to Belfast for Christmas.

February: Back to Belfast and then travel back to Bristol from vaguely "up north" England, maybe Durham.

Easter: Hopefully Pwllheli for New Word Alive. Shall be looking for people interested in going on Week 2 in due course...

May: Probably few days in Oxford.

Should be enough to keep me busy. Most of it is laid around getting time to go back to Belfast and taking detours on the way there or the way back, but definitely a couple of big escapades to keep me amused...

A realisation...

It's quite easy to order stuff from Play.com. Perhaps too easy. Hmmm.

It's quite cheap though...

Folly and the Criminal Records Bureau

I'm just about to fill out another CRB form. From the amount I fill out you'd think they know something...

It's a rather silly system that you need to go through. Most places only require a CRB check every two or three years, so you'd think that it would be enough to go through the full disclosure once, and then be issued with a certificate to say that nothing has shown up. Then, if any role or job requires CRB clearance, you could just present the certificate. Simple.

But no, you need to go through a CRB check for every specific job. As a result, I presently have a full disclosure used to approve me for studying for my PGCE, I'm applying for another for the purposes of working at my new school and now I'm about to fill in a form to apply for yet another one so that I can clean toilets on a camp that children will be attending. Craziness...

Not as unusual as I'd like...

My fellow maths teachers may be able to testify to how familiar this is...

From continued pondering about my accent...

My kids are getting closer at least. Today I was asked whether I was Scottish by my Year 8s, which I would say is a good deal of improvement on the usual guess of American.

As it is I had one of those days that makes me think a bit more that maybe I've picked the correct career path. I'm teaching a bit more, and I'm more relaxed when I get into a classroom, the result being that I'm having better lessons. Praying this will continue, but considering I have a (probably unhelpful) tendency to write here when I'm discouraged about teaching, it's probably worthwhile writing at a time when I'm feeling a little more positive. :)

I'm sure they have some sort of survaillance watching me...

This is probably a little to close to a diagram explaining why I'm often quite tired at school. Considering it has pretty much been the model for most of my time at university, this is somewhat unsurprising.

Thanks again to PhD Comic providing uncomfortably true commentaries on my life... I think I'm going to go to bed now, or maybe I'll just surf the 'net for a bit longer...

Maybe it is just for the good of my health...

The TES magazine reports a Year 1 pupil's question to their teacher:

"What job do you do?"

Before you think that this sort of mistake is unique to 5 year olds, one of the teachers today reported that she'd left her payslip on her desk, and was asked by one of her Year 7 what it was. She explained that it was her payslip, and that she'd just been paid. The response,

"Oh, so what do you do then?"

It's hard to know how to respond to that...

Thoughts on Baptism (possible first of many)

This is quite possibly the first time I have written about this, so here goes. It seems that the most controversial view that I have held onto since arriving in Oxford concerns the issue of baptism. I have become rather widely know as a credobaptist (that is the belief that baptism should be conducted in adulthood post-conversion). The majority of my peers, not to mention the leaders whose teaching I sit under, believe in paedobaptism (otherwise known as infant baptism). Hence, much conversation has been exchanged to convince me of the error of my ways. I have thus far resisted - nearly six years now and counting.

My defence of my belief has always pointed to the simple reading of the New Testament. It suggests from the flow of the narrative is that apostles called for conversion, and baptism was administered in response to that. That would seem to suggest this to be normative, and it also seemed to be common sense. I do now realise that there are a few of problems with this approach. Firstly, the situation in Acts does not allow much insight into how infants were treated - the situation was that the gospel was going out for the first time and so we read of conversions of adults, and so it is rather likely that the examples we read of in Acts are shaped massively by the temporal setting of the activities. Another reason for not considering this argument to be a sure foundation is that it demonstrates a fallacy of treating a specific example as normative. An example of this approach elsewhere would be to take Daniel’s model for prayer in Daniel 6 and insist that proper prayer must be conducted three times a day and directed towards Jerusalem. To make such an application would be to read too much into the specific example, and in fact may lead to miss the teaching point of a passage. Basically, to make a sure conviction about an issue, we must base it on much surer theology than being backed up by examples.

It is in the spirit of searching for this surer theology that I may consider writing a little more about my present conviction on baptism. I shall give away the present state of affairs - I am still a credobaptist, and am as yet unaware of an argument to convince me otherwise. I am at the same time aware that my being a credobaptist has become a bit of a cherished distinction that I hold on to, and it may not be for entirely biblical reasons. Luther famously commented that “Ecclesia Reformata est semper Reformanda”, that is the reformed church is every reforming, and it is in this spirit that I do intend to carefully consider this issue.

I encourage my paedobaptist brethren not to start their celebrations yet though, they could well be premature. Expect further ramblings on this in due course...

The Countdown begins, so to speak

I have realised that in two months tomorrow, my lease for my college room will have finished, and I shall have moved to Bristol. Scary.

My hope that admission and realisation of this fact will aid in the fight of sentimentalised feelings about Oxford in the run up to my move. Experience suggests that there is a fat lot of chance of that happening, but one lives in hope...

New music! For free!

Coldplay are releasing a new album - how exciting. It's apparently going to be out on the 16th June, and I'll more than likely be purchasing it shortly after that...

Anyway, for anyone who were unaware of it, the first single of the new album, Violet Hill, is available for free download from the Coldplay website. Shall have to be enough to tide me by in the meantime...

Contemporary Bible Readings III

This is a series continued from a previous blog, which focused on finding a certain turn of phrase found while reading the bible, and as a side point showing how the text can seem to take a rather different tone and meaning if removed from context. Essentially though, it is somewhat tongue in cheek.

The latest offering finds it's amusement value in the context of my present vocation. It comes from the end of Mark 5:35, in the story of the Jairus' daughter. In the story, one of the members of Jairus' household comes with news that the daughter is dead, and then asks the question:

Why trouble the teacher any further?

I think I'm going to have that printed and posted at the back of my classes...

A'm still frae Belfast, ye knae...

Facebook assures me that I am indeed Norn Iron Born and Bred. Although there is no accounting for the accuracy of quiz in determining one's place of birth, it reassuring to know that the result of a 12 question quiz suggests that the effects of prolonged exile from the moarlan' are still limited.

I shall sleep easy this evening.

Constructive use of chaos (well, sort of...)

There are some bit of pupil mischief that you feel bad for clamping down on. Today, as you may have heard on the news was the NUT strike. I'm not going to say much about that beyond commenting that it makes the chances of my joining the NUT next year fairly slim. Anyhow, my new school was able to open for uppers school (that is years 10-13), but years 7, 8 and 9 weren't in. Hence a letter was sent to the parents of pupils in year 7, 8 and 9 to explain that due to Industrial Action, they wouldn't be able to come into school that day.

This letter was apparently published on the school website. The staff meeting this morning there were reports that some of the year 10 pupils has downloaded the letter, edited it to read "years 7, 8, 9 and 10" then handed it to their parents to their parents to get a question-free day off.

This is clearly truancy, but at the same time, there's an extent that you don't want to trample on the ingenuity. I almost want to give them some reward for their creativity...

Oops...

Hmmm, I think I may have turned down the BBC a little too rashly. Ah well, 'tis done now, and it's probably in the best interests of my credibility...

Dissertationing - Day three

And it's all over - I had a quick run over my first draft this morning over coffee at the Jericho Café, came back to my room to make a few changes, printed it all off and submitted it. All that and it's not even lunchtime yet!

As it is now, I have a few days of actual holiday. I think it's the first time since September that I haven't had anything looming that I should be doing, so I can legitimately take time off. This generally means I'll need to find things to stop me getting bored...

Dissertationing - Day two

First draft is done! It's not very good, but it's done...

This means I'm still on track for submitting the finished dissertation by the end of tomorrow. I would like people to note that if I do keep to schedule this will be two assignments that I'll have submitted ahead of schedule. Maybe I'm a changed man...

Dissertationing - Day one

For quite possibly the first time this year, I think I had a plan for my first day attempting to write an assignment and kept pretty close to what I'd planned. Literature Review, Introduction and Methodology sections all seem to be in place (well, the first drafts of those anyway...). I am beginning to feel bold enough to publish my plan for the next couple of days, we shall see how long this lasts. I'm hoping tomorrow morning to write the results analysis and conclusion sessions, then in the afternoon when I can't be bothered think to just sit and mindlessly compile the dissertation into one document, add a title page, contents and abstract, then print the whole thing and leave it. Then Wednesday I can do a review of that draft and make corrections, and assuming there's nothing major, print off final copies and submit on Wednesday afternoon.

If all that goes to plan, I might have a few days to sit back at the end of the week. At the moment, I don't have any of my schemes of work, so there's actually nothing else to do. Except get some rest I suppose. Craziness...

Back to broadcasting from within the bubble

I've been off the blogsphere for a week, so here's a quick recap of the last week:

• I've just got back from Pwllheli after a week at New Word Alive (hence the absence). The teaching was fantastic - I shall possibly give some musing from the wisdom of John Piper (2 talks on Romans 8), Don Carson (4 talks on 1 John), Terry Virgo (1 talk on Romans 5) and Mike Ovey (3 talks on the Doctrine of Humanity). I've been sold and would like to go back, but...
• Next year they are doing two tracks, encouraging all the young people and students to go to the first week. The second week is a family focus. In the choice of the two, I think I fit in the first. Unfortunately, I don't - the first week falls before the end of term so that's not an option. I shall have to check what exactly is meant by "family focus", but at the moment my first reaction is not enthusiastic. I shall see...
• In other news, I've been accepted for Mastermind. Unfortunately, my job is not noted for its flexibility with vacation (see above), and I don't think I'll be able to make it. This is probably just as well, as I don't really know anything about the specialist subject that has been negotiated (Cryptography in the 20th Century for anyone interested). I think I'll wait to respond to the BBC until I get to my new school and then I can see how responsive they'll be to me taking a day off to record it. On the positive side, I will almost certainly only be required for one day - the chances of reaching the second round is minimal...

So that's what's happened last week. This week I need to do some work - my dissertation is due next Monday and hasn't been started in any meaningful way... I shall be therefore camping out in the RSL bunker for most of the week. Distraction will be very much appreciated if anyone wishes to join me down there. Hopefully I'll be able to arrange some lunch and dinner dates to keep me sane...

When the end comes

Today was my last day at The Henry Box School. I have to say, I'm rather sad to leave, I've been very lucky to have a very good and supportive department for my first placement school, and I've made a number of good friendships there, not to mention some degree of rapport with some of the classes.

The other thing is that I have that weird feeling of anticlimax that comes from straining towards finishing something. It doesn't really feel like I've achieved anything, I've just got there, survived. It doesn't really feel like there's anything worth celebrating. Instead, I now drift into the purposeless limbo that comes from being in transition. I've become slightly aware of how much my identity and purpose comes from what I'm doing, and the classes that I'm teaching. Although it is nice not to have to worry about lesson planning for a couple of weeks (and possibly longer than that by the time induction finishes in my next school), not having any to do makes me feel a little useless. It's a bit depressing really.

Anyway, I've got my dissertation to keep me amused. In addition, there's a trip to Chippy tomorrow to see if I can locate my new school and then I'm off to North Wales. Let's hope that's enough to keep at bay potential despair at my teaching...

Unlocking the door and glimpsing a new world

I had one of these nice moments when I was able to engage in some mathematical enrichment with a student while killing time at the end of study group today. He was waiting around for a friend to finish getting help from his class teacher, and he just asks me what I thought was the "best thing invented in mathematics" was. Cue half an hour bringing him through internet cryptography in the 20th Century, which he did seem to grasp and enjoy. I love the little bits of random mathematics that you can talk about at times, it's a real opportunity to get excited about what you do in between trying to summon the motivation to talk about bar charts and negative numbers. Again...

I did something amazing...

I gave blood today. And unlike my previous attempt, I managed to stay conscious through the whole thing. This was mainly due to not rushing to the refreshment area to get coffee...

I even manage to maintain enough energy to finish off my year 8 reports. I feel I'm having a virtuous evening, so don't feel at all guilty about lazing back and watching The West Wing for a substantial part of it!

The State of Education, Easter assessment...

Well, I've met my mentor from Chipping Norton, and it seems that I should be able to do much of what I'd like to do for S2. This includes more A-level teaching, which makes me happy. My mentor seemed to be very happy when I mentioned that I'm a mechanics specialist...

Additionally, I've also got my result for CA2, which was the essay on my lessons with year 10 last term. I've passed at Master Level, so it appears I'm still on for my masters credits, which I shall not complain about. It seems the examiners quite liked my lesson evaluation, particularly when I discussed its weaknesses, well, there wasn't much to write about if I'd left out the weaknesses... It all appears that I remain on course to qualify as a teacher. At some point they're going to figure out how silly it is to put me in the care of a group of childrens' education...

Moving on and moving away...

After telling everyone that the odds were that my second school placement would be closer than my first, they've found me somewhere further away. Great. Chipping Norton here I come...

Losing the eye-wear

Well, despite having a reputation of being squeamish when it comes to anything eye related, yesterday I put in contact lenses myself for the very first time. I have to say, it wasn't nearly as bad as I thought it would be, although despite having put them in and taken them out several times, I still feel that each time I succeed, it's a fluke. Long may my luck continue...

It's quite a bizarre feeling to walk out without my glasses on, and I still have to check myself when I leave my room. It's also quite a different visual sensation. I was warned that my vision wouldn't be as good as it was with my glasses, as I have a slight astigmatism which can't be corrected with my lenses, so the short-sightedness has been corrected but things are still a little blurry, which is odd. But so far, I'm quite enjoying the time I'm spend my time looking at the world without a frame, and I'm sure I'll get used to the difference.

A break from being bogged down in admin...

The posting rate has went down in the last couple of days. This might be because I'm actually working rather than pretending to do so...

8 days to go. I've far too much to do in those 8 days, but still, 8 days...

Oh and by the way, I've passed the professional side of my Assessment Reference Point. Curriculum side happens on Friday...

Christos Anesti!

The sayings of the angels at the tomb,

“Why do you seek the living among the dead? He is not not here, but he has risen. Remember how he told you, while he was still in Galilee, that the Son of Man must be delivered into the hands of sinful men and be crucified and on the third day rise.”

Luke 24:5b-7

Christ is risen indeed! Alleluia!

“Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ! According to his great mercy, he has caused us to be born again to a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, to an inheritance that is imperishable, undefiled, and unfading, kept in heaven for you, who by God’s power are being guarded through faith for a salvation ready to be revealed in the last time.”

1 Peter 1:3-5

Fishing for books

I think Les Misérables has become my favourite book. It has long been George Orwell's 1984, but I found Les Mis to have a much more gripping story line (very much propelled by the intrigue as to how Jean will escape each situation), and of course a much more pleasant ending, although Les Mis's was definitely bittersweet. I do have to say though, I feel guilty now that I've found out how long the unabridged version is, it's hard not to feel a little like a cheat...

My reintroduction to fiction has been rather enjoyable, much fuelled by good recommendation. I think my next target is something by H.G. Wells, possibly The Time Machine or The Invisible Man, but if anyone wishes to suggest something else, I would gladly be diverted. Just remember that I'm an engineer-of-sorts, reading isn't a strong point!

Orange and Turing...

Orange's Pay as you Go automated credit line has for a while employed a script to make it sound like you are talking to a real person. Obviously not completely convincing, or for that matter convincing at all as real operator generally don't ask you to key in the values on the keypad, but it was quite a nice touch, if a little creepy. But it's creepiness has increased - they have now incorporated voice recognition, so that you speak to the recording. Bizarre. Considering I've been known to say "Thank you" to ATMs, this is messing with my mind...

The Good Friday Agreement

I didn't realise until I passed the Belfast Telegraph offices today, but it's 10 years since the Good Friday Agreement (well, not really, but this is the problem with moveable feasts...). This topic still produces a little bit of internal conflict within me, the basis of which is whether we can ever satisfy ourselves that the ends justify the means.

The issue is that the Good Friday Agreement did mean agreeing to power-share with people who for most of their lives as terrorist, often in the most reprehensible way. Many were thugs who used the excuse of political conflict to indulge their blood-thirst and further their own means. The result of the Good Friday Agreement was that some of these men were given respectability and a major role in the governance of the province. There is a strong sense, I feel, that justice has not be done in Northern Ireland, and people who have committed some heinous crimes will have got away with it (in this life at least).

But the results of this are hard to argue with. With the exception of a few isolated incidents such as the Omagh bombings and the riots that occasionally flair up in parts of Belfast, Northern Ireland has experienced a decade of peace. And the consequences is increased prosperity for the province. You don't have to talk to me for very long to figure out my opinion of the beauty of my homeland, yet for many years our tourism industry was stifled because many people were afraid to visit. Peace removes this fear, and tourists have flooded in and prosperity has increased. This prosperity has been quite noticeable on my brief tour around Belfast this morning - I don't think I've seen so much building work going on in the city, and while I was away a new high-end shopping mall was opened in the centre of town. Belfast and the rest of Northern Ireland has benefited greatly from the aftermath of the Good Friday Agreement, and there is much to give praise for.

I think I am always going to feel somewhat uncomfortable about this issue, but pragmatically, I wouldn't want to do anything that moves us backwards from where we are now. I suspect that if the peace process can be continued without flare up until a new generation of politicians take the reigns of the province, ones that haven't been tainted by the nastiness of the troubles, then it will be much easier to put the past behind us and move on with the tentative hope that the "Ireland problem" may be nearing to solution. But for now, I think many will feel the tension that comes from the bad associations that our present leaders bring to mind.

I should add a disclaimer to my thoughts. I have what could be described as a true Norn Irish heart, but it should be noted that I am now an exile in my 6th year, and so my opinions should not be taken as those of one in touch with the feeling of people of Northern Ireland. I'm sure that I could be described as being out of touch or, even worse, having a "touch of the English" around my opinions! So be warned...

Oh, it's a hill! I mustn't be in Oxford then...

Here's a post that is actually coming from Belfast! I arrived safely home just before 10pm last night.

Travel was fairly smooth this time. Despite leaving Oxford at rush hour on the eve of a bank holiday weekend, and having to share a rather packed train to Birmingham International with a rather large number of squaddies slowly getting more drunk as the train progressed, I managed to go one step better than last time by making it to the airport in good time. My waiting time at the airport was pleasant, due to a fair amount of time to grab a pint and start my book - I've started reading an abridged version of Les Misèrables, which so far has been surprisingly readable and gripping and certainly whiled away the transit time. When getting off the plane, I spied an old classmate from Belfast High who I hadn't seen in years. It was very nice to catch up, and also got me a lift from the airport to my house which saved me from negotiating the Belfast bus network in the late evening.

So I'm back until Monday, enjoying being reintroduced to home. The weather has kept things interesting - we've had true "if you don't like it, wait a minute" stuff today! Shall be meeting up with a friend tomorrow to be introduced to the changes to the city since I was last around, should be fun. Unfortunately, my aim to not have any work to get on with hasn't come to be - a few lesson plans, long term plans and dissertation ideas need to be sorted out, but I hope that won't be too bad...

Going home? That's tomorrow?

I've just printed out my boarding pass for tomorrow. I head back on a latish flight from Birmingham tomorrow evening, and to be honest, it's not really shown up on my radar. It's quite odd.

I have to ask, am I the only person this happens to? This seems to be rather a regular occurrence me, that I have trouble looking beyond what I'm doing now and don't really get excited about something that is coming up. It might be just a consequence of being busy.

Anyway, just a 6th form lesson tomorrow, then a bit of a rush to get back, changed and packed before catching my train to Birmingham and should be back home by tomorrow evening. I'm not sure if I'm going to succeed in my aim to not bring any work home with me though... :(

Maybe I should just start a subscription to the Guardian...

Not quite expected...

According to The Political Compass, I am apparently -4.62 on the Economic Left/Right scale (read: mad raving lefty) and -0.46 on Social Libertarian/Authoritarian scale (read: confused).

I'm not sure how this happened. I have two options I suppose - I can accept that I may not be as conservative as I thought, or I can bury my head in the sand. I think I'm going to consult with some ostriches...

In case anyone is concerned...

Thanks for the various people who have contacted me over the last few days, I really appreciate it. I hope I haven't overly concerned anyone - I'm bearing up, it's just that I get moments where I feel on a real low, and for some reason I find that I'm particularly vulnerable over the weekend, possibly because I get the time for an unhealthy amount of introspection. Anyway, I'm feeling I should probably ban myself from this on Sunday afternoons for the obvious reasons.

Anyway, thanks again for messages, they've been of great encouragement and I do value your prayers!

We rest in thee

One good thing about my work this evening is that I had an excuse to listen to the music of the lyrics that I was cyphering. Not that I need much excuse...

The Finlandia Hymn takes its tune from a section of Finlandia (surprisingly enough...) by Jean Sibelius, and will be a familiar tune for some, as it is used for a number of other songs and hymns. Notably from a personal perspective, it lends its tune to my favourite hymn, for which I rarely need much provocation to quote it...

"We rest in thee, our shield and our defender,
We go not forth alone against the foe,
Strong in thy strength, safe in thy keeping tender,
We rest in thee, and in thy name we go.

Yes in thy name, O captain of salvation,
Yes in thy name, all other names above.
Jesus, our righteousness, our sure foundation,
Our prince of glory and our king of love.

We go in faith, our own great weakness feeling,
And needing more each day thy grace to know,
Yet from our hearts, a song of triumph pealing,
"We rest in thee, and in thy name we go!"

We rest in thee, our shield and our defender,
Thine is the battle, thine shall be the praise!
When passing through the gates of pearly splendor,
Victors, we'll rest with thee through endless days."

The price of a good idea

I've just spent a considerable portion of this evening cyphering Hen Wlad Fy Nhadau, La Marseillaise, Nessun Dorma, the Finlandia Hymn and Ein Feste Burg ist unser Gott for the purpose of having a "fun" cryptography investigation with my year 8's.

Here's hoping that after all that it actually works...

I'm sure it wasn't deliberate, but it's still rubbing it in...

Conversation while coming home from Ledbury:

Driver: So, that would be the end of term for you then?
Me: No, I've another three weeks...
Driver: Three weeks!?! That's a bit rubbish!

True. I remember when Ledbury was the end of term. Sigh... Never mind, I think I'm prepared for tomorrow now, then it's a four day week. Back home to Belfast on Thursday, so that's something to look forward to.

Uncertain walks but certain futures

I'm back from a brief trip to Ledbury, with some of my work needing doing this weekend done, although by no means all of it. Sigh, but I should be able to sort it out later on. I'm afraid that I was in a bit of a poor mood over the weekend, and that it may have shown. Apologies for anyone who was in contact with me and felt me being pretty distant. It's fair to say I'm not entirely coping at the moment, and there are times that I don't cover it very well.

Anyway, as it was the topic of the talks at the weekend, being the resurrection, were useful for me. This year has been and continues to be very tough, and although I tend to get into a bit of a poor emotional and mental state, I need to be in mind of what happened on the first Easter and what that means. In particular the fact that my hope is alive because of the resurrection - Christ is the firstfruits of a new life and I can look forward to that with certainty. There is a time coming when things will be renewed and returned to how they should be. When things are bad, I need to remember that it won't be eternal, trust in God, look to the great future He has prepared and cling to the promise that comes by His raising His Son from the dead.

And in the meantime, I shall continue to serve Him and His people on this earth as I wait patiently. Although sometimes my service is lacking, and my patience is often running to the end of its measure.

Soli Deo Gloria. Amen.

A piece of π

I know I'm a little late into it, but Happy Pi Day everyone!

Pottering with numbers...

I've just had about an hours worth of happy mathematising (probably not a word. Yet...), playing around with some centre of mass stuff after dealing with a few sixth formers' questions in after school study group. I've not done that much, really just proving the standard formula for the centre of mass for a circular arc and uniform sector, as well as finally beating into submission one of the tougher questions in the exercises. But that's not the point. It's nice to mess around with numbers every now and again and realise that I still enjoy it somewhat...

I also made it to a twilight seminar in the Department of Education held by John Mason, which was really good - demonstrating a tool called "structured variable grids", which seem to be a useful aid in promoting pattern spotting, and are something I want to have a look at to see if I can make some use of it in my lessons. Very enjoyable session in its own right anyway, lots of fun trying to figure the patterns out and predict what the next term would be. Anyone interested in seeing what they are about, I've been told copies of the grids can be found at John's website here, although I've yet to check that out myself.

Has left me feeling reasonably productive and motivated by the end of the day. Even though I still have a rather significant amount of work awaiting me tomorrow...

Bean

For any mac users out there, I thought I'd highlight the existence of Bean, a little word processing application. I have to admit that I'm struggling to put my finger on what it is I really like about it, but I can say it's a quick alternative to OpenOffice.org and will do most of the things you need it to do.

If I were to pick some nice features, there is a nice toolbar for paragraph formatting with sliders which allow the text body to update while you use them, and also there's a pretty funky live word count that I find useful from an obsessive "how many words have I to go" sort of perspective...

(The logo is also a cup of coffee. Is it possible that's enough to affect me?)

What to do, what to do...

BBC iPlayer has had a rather revolutionary impact in how I've spent my downtime in the last half a year or so (and it is possibly fair to say it has had an effect on how I procrastinate as well...), but it does lead to nights like this when it doesn't seem to be working. What am I going to do now? Work I suppose. Hmmm, maybe not...

Better news on other fronts though - put my jacket on earlier and found a £5 note in the pocket. Result!

Getting the scale right

Following on with part of what I said in the previous post, I had a glance at this earlier today. The example given is unfortunately so common to how many Christians try to explain grace. The problem is to an extent that so often we try and make nice illustrations of topics, which unfortunately often fall far short of hitting with the real impact of what we are trying to describe (something that I am sure I fall victim to, I have a habit of trying to find analogies for everything). In this case, grace is in danger of being interpreted as an unexpected pleasantry.

Sometimes, it's worth considering why we feel the need to find illustrations and aids to understanding. Sometimes it's because we struggle to see the "mechanics" of how something works, and so an illustration can be useful to understand the concept. But with grace, our problem isn't so much understanding the concept - most people can get the idea of a free gift - but actually grasping the scale of the gift. If this is case, illustrations like offering people free jelly beans doesn't really help people to appreciate the full force of the message of scripture. In these instances, it is often better to forego the attempt at illustrating and instead allow exposition to do the work:

"For while we were still weak, at the right time Christ died for the ungodly. For one will scarcely die for a righteous man–though perhaps for a good person one would dare even to die– but God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us."

Romans 5:6-8

This is the magnitude of God's love for us. We were his enemies, living in open rebellion against him, yet his response is to send his Son to die in our place. This is the idea and the magnitude of God's grace, and it's this thought that we must seek to meditate in the inevitable and (if you are like me) the all too common moments when we slip into "jelly bean" type thinking.

Sunday evening ramblings

I am starting to get what has been described by another PGCE student as the "Sunday night fear". I think of all the things in this year, this has been the hardest - very rarely do things seem to stop for a while or even slow down. This is most noticeable over the weekends, you get a brief "Friday feeling", this slowly descends on Saturday as you realise how much planning you have to do and leaves you on Sunday evening feeling completely unprepared to face the week. Gah...

I feel that I'm getting a little too negative at times, and I'm finding it hard to turn the tide at some points, but it's worth reflecting on good things as well. This morning at church we continued our series in Romans, looking this morning at the second half of Romans 7. As we've been going through this series, it becomes easier to see why Luther found his study in this book to be so revolutionary to his thinking. Grace is truly amazing. To read such a passage that chimes so strongly with our own experience, pointing to the evidence in our own lives the powerlessness of the law to deal with our sinfulness has again brought me back to realising how great a gift the cross and resurrection is. What a great thing to remember when feeling on a low ebbe - we are without power to help ourselves, but Christ has rescued us and brought us to eternal life. Good news indeed. I may be experiencing "the fear", but it's good to remember that all my needs are met in Christ, and I pray that will spur me on anew to enter the coming week keen to bring glory to the One who has brought me life.

"Wretched man that I am! Who will deliver me from this body of death? Thanks be to God through Jesus Christ our Lord!"

Romans 7:24-25a

Amen.

Approaching transition...

Something is slowly beginning to dawn on me. As I've mentioned, I now have a job for next year, and in fact, I'll be starting that in July coming. This will involve me moving to Bristol on what could well be a long term basis. There are two consequences of this:

1. In July, I will actually leave Oxford. Not forever, I'm sure I'll be visiting, and probably quite regularly. But I will be leaving with little intention of returning to live. This will be the first time in six years. Even my year to Malaysia was embarked upon with the intention of returning after a year.
2. This will probably signal the end to my claim that I still live in Belfast, something that I've been hanging onto despite much evidence for some time now. My home will still be there, but I think once I've got a permanent job somewhere over water my claim to primary residence there begins to hold increasingly less water...

These two facts are surprisingly scary. Particularly and unexpectedly the first one, it's quite odd how big a part of my life Oxford has taken up over the last few years.

Anyway, no time for despair just yet. Before the big move I still have the predictable mountain of paperwork to complete, a house to sort out for the coming year and I believe I still have a bit to go to secure Qualified Teacher Status. Sigh...

And much to my actual surprise...

It appears I am indeed employable. From June, assuming that I achieve Qualified Teacher Status and my CRB disclosure comes back clean, I shall be working for St Mary Redcliffe and Temple School in Bristol. I am feeling rather chuffed about this, the school left quite a bit impression on me when I visited yesterday. Next job then, I have to find accommodation in Bristol. But for the time being, that can wait as I revel in the fact that I don't have to fill in any more application forms this year! :)

Oh dear...

Quote from the staff room today:

"You seem to be upbeat! What's wrong?"

Hmmm, not a great reflection on how I've been the last few months... I am feeling a little more positive now, hopefully that will last for a while. The break seems to have been useful, and its been nice to get onto a shortlist for a job. Still a tough few month ahead, but end is in sight...

The power of favourable associations

Continuing recent posts regarding job applications, people who have attended summer camps with me may appreciate the temptation that has been laid in front of me by the fact that Queen's College, Taunton, is advertising for a mathematics teacher for September 2008. Hmmm...

Sometimes happy to be wrong...

OK, just forget some of my comments from yesterday, I've just got a phone call inviting me to an interview at St Mary Redcliffe! Yay!

The shame...

I am looking for a job. A few days ago though, I was glancing through the job supplement of the Times Educational Supplement, and while there I had a look under the school type "Independent Senior". I may be tempted...

In other news, I applied to St Mary Redcliffe and Temple School in Bristol, but as the deadline was yesterday and I've still to hear from them, I fear that my application may have been rejected. Never mind, I have also heard that my internship school will be placing an advert in the TES next week, so naturally shall be applying for that. Shall see if I am actually employable...