Have you heard the one about the statistician, the number theorist and the engineer?

My classes have been suffering from mathematical jokes. I feel I should spread them more widely...

A mathematician decides he wants to leave the mathematics trade and become a fireman, so he goes to the local fire department. "OK, then, let's see how you do in a little test," the fire chief says, "What would you do if you passed an alley and say there was a bin on fire?" "Well," replied the mathematician, "I'd get a hose, connect to an hydrant, and then pour water on until fire goes out." "Very good, but what would you do if there was no fire?"

The mathematician thinks for a bit, then says "Well, then I'd have to find a match and set the bin on fire." The fire chief nearly chokes, "Why on earth would you do that?" "It's obvious, it reduces it to a problem I've already solved..."

Boom, Boom! More on the computing end of things...

Why do mathematicians get Hallowe'en and Christmas confused?

Because for a mathematician, Oct 31 is the same as Dec 25!

And for the true geeks...

What's white, non-orientable and lives in the sea?

Möbius Dick

I'm here all week, just so you know...

Connecting with the Norn Irish in me

I live my life as an exile - I've now been living in England for some seven years and counting, with no prospect of returning to the motherland. As a result, I enjoy indulging in anything Northern Irish whenever it's presented to me. One of the avenues of this indulgence is the writings of John Pepper, a columnist for the Belfast Telegraph. I've been rereading his Illustrated Encyclopedia of Ulster Knowledge, which is hilarious in a "so true" sense for anyone from, or for that matter has visited, Northern Ireland. Take this entry under Exile:

"The Exile doesn't exist who fails to prick up his ears at the sound of a familiar accent far from home."

I remember times in Oxford when I had to be dragged away from people after a half hour conversation with a total stranger based solely on our common homeland. While there have been a number of laughs come from it, I'm feeling like getting a copy of it for my English friends, then they might have a fighting chance of understanding what I'm on about when I refer to scallion, sodas or start to talk about it being donkeys since we last did something...

Mightier than the Waves

I have just returned from a weekend on the North Cornish coast with a few members of my small group from church. It was spectacular, and I feel that there may be a competitor for the North Antrim Coast as contender for favourite spot on earth. I'm hoping it won't be the last time I'm back! The photo on the right comes from the Bedruthan Steps near Mawgan Porth. We climbed down at high tide, and so the waters were surging right up to the bottom of the stone staircase, and looking a little ferocious. One of the people reminded me though of Psalm 93, which rather coincidentally was read out at church this evening:

The Lord reigns; he is robed in majesty;
the Lord is robed; he has put on strength as his belt.
Yes, the world is established; it shall never be moved.
Your throne is established from of old;
you are from everlasting.

The floods have lifted up, O Lord,
the floods have lifted up their voice;
the floods lift up their roaring.
Mightier than the thunders of many waters,
mightier than the waves of the sea,
the Lord on high is mighty!

Your decrees are very trustworthy;
holiness befits your house,
O Lord, forevermore.

From my perspective, these waves were pretty mighty! What an amazing God we serve! It's always nice when you experience something that allows you to appreciate such a truth anew.